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mimi playing the piano

mimi playing one of pieces in her new piano book

mimi has plunked around with the piano by herself long enough...about a week ago, i finally decided to give her piano lessons myself. previously, i had tried out this company called Musika. got matched with two teachers and both of them ended up standing me up. so, fed up with them, i decided to just try to teach mimi how to play the piano myself. i found a beginning piano book on amazon that got good reviews and when the book arrived on our doorstep, i showed it to mimi and got her excited about learning to play real songs on the piano.

i decided that playing the piano would just be a normal part of every day...like brushing teeth, or reading books, or walking the dog. it just was something we'd do together every day.

the first day, she was really gung-ho. she sat there and really wanted to play and did everything i told her. found the black keys, found the white keys, identified the pattern, identified the keys, learned the numbering of her fingers, bass/treble, up/down, blahblahblah. then i showed her the songs in the book and she really wanted to learn them and was practicing long after i told her the lessons were over.

by day 3, we began songs that involved using both hands and including quarter notes, half notes, dotted half notes, and whole notes, and i started to intervene quite a bit to help her play the right notes. well, she doesnt like it when i tell her what to do (this is why i was looking for a teacher for her in the first place) and so she'd cross her arms and refuse to play until i went away. mmkay... how am i supposed to teach ya if i go away??? yeah...slight problem.

the next day, while at the grocery store w/mimi, i went down the magazine and greeting card aisle and had mimi pick out some stickers that she really liked. when we had piano practice that evening, i pulled out the stickers and turned to the songs in the book that she had practiced so much that she was able to play smoothly, and told her how all that practicing helped her to play these pieces so well, that they each deserved a sticker.

now, i wasnt sure if she was going to go for this. the child has an explosion of stickers in her play room to do with as she pleases. i wasnt sure she would care about one more sticker. i was banking on making these 'special' stickers because they werent going to be just handed over to her, she would have to earn them. it always worked with my students when i was teaching and those kids were 8 and 9 years old! and believe it or not, sometimes they would work harder if i walked by their desk with just a Mr Sketch scented marker with a promise that i would put some delightfully fruity happy faces on their best cursive formations, and their heads would bend down just a little closer to their papers and they would work extra hard at forming their letters correctly to get a raspberry scented smile from which they could happily inhale themselves to oblivion. (i'll have to dig up those old markers if the stickers dont work out for me!).

so i say, oh, yes, this one you played beautifully last time. let's hear it again. so she plays the piece. and i clap and congratulate her on a job well done and bestow her with the sheet of stickers to chose a special one to grace the page with. she is so excited about it and very carefully selects one to stick on the page, and before that sticker is even fully stuck on the page, her hands are trying to turn the page and she's telling me she can play this other piece really well and can she get a sticker on that one too?

finally she has stickers on all the pages we've learned thus far and we get to the one that had all those hand switching and different notes. the one that she refused to allow me to help her with and of couse she's not quite getting it right. she just needs a little tiny bit of guidance and she could do it, but the trick is getting her to let me help her.

so she finishes the piece, but not well. well, she wants a sticker for that page. i said to her, sure, but it's not quite ready for a sticker yet. maybe tomorrow. and i show her how to play it correctly and give her some pointers (and i see her go stoney faced even as i do it). a little more practice is all it takes, i say. and then i conclude practice for the day and i get up to leave, but mimi refuses to leave the piano. she wants that sticker for that page. now her arms are crossed, her face is scowling, and she's 'humpf!'ing repeatedly. i'm not leaving! she declares emphatically.

oh, would you like to practice some more? i say, innocently, as if i can't tell she's pissed off with me.

humpf! she answers.

would you like a some help? i ask her gently.

now she's rubbing her eyes as she feels the sting of tears and starting to feel sorry for herself. i'll never get it right! she shouts at me. (that's the perfectionist in her).

and i have to remind her how remember how hard it was to whistle? but you kept trying and practicing and one day, you whistled? and you kept practicing and now you can whistle every time you want to? this song is a lot like that. i know you want to play it without having to think about it too much or having to work at it, but getting good at something takes time. sure it can be hard, but when you can get it, isnt it worth all that hard work?

yes, she nods.

i am happy to help you. you dont have to do it all by yourself, okay?

okay, mama. she says. so we sit back down and i help her through the piece and she is showing marked improvements already and i can tell she knows it. it still wasnt sticker worthy, but we ended on a good note (no pun intended).

the next morning, the first thing she did after waking up was go downstairs and practice that piece on her own. i was still upstairs nursing ozzy and i could hear her plugging away at it. when i came downstairs, she told me she practiced and she hoped she could get a sticker.

oh, the power of stickers.

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