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Day 1: Operation: Slumber Party

I WANT SLEEP!!! i could cry...that is, if i had any moisture left in me to do so.

so we went with the aforementioned plan for me to get sleep when ozzy goes down for the night. he went down to sleep at 7:30 pm tonight as i was nursing him the final time and so even tho i'm not sleepy, i crawl into bed at 8 (and yes, rob took over with mimi and got her upstairs to prep for bed at 7:45 and i didnt have to say anything! i know, how awesome is THAT! i dont know which was better...that she was upstairs at a decent time or that i didnt have to nag! I LOVE YOU, HONEY! if i didnt have ozzy latched on at the time, i might have done a little dance). so, i get in bed and then i lay in bed for almost an hour trying to will myself to sleep (mimi is in her bedroom reading at the top of her lungs and all the doors in the world couldnt block out that sound, rob is running in and out of the bathroom doing his nighttime ritual, mimi is knocking on my bedroom door calling through the cracks "mommy? where's daddy? mommy, are you awake or no? mommy? mommy? mommy?" GAAAAHHHH!

finally the house is quiet and i do drift off to sleep. suddenly, i'm wide awake. my boobs are screaming for relief and my throat and mouth feel like the SubSaharan Desert as every last drop of moisture gets sucked out of me to produce Ozzy Martinis (bartender, i'll have a some of your house special, straight up, and make it a double).

one glance at the clock tells me i've only slept for less than 3 hours... go back to sleep...go back to sleep...go back to sleep i will myself. NOTHING. the dehydration is getting worse by the minute. at the risk of Too Much Information (somethings are probably better left unsaid) i can feel hemorrhoids forming and i think i better get some water. oh, and i ate a big ole steak for dinner tonight...nothing like a side of beef on hemorrhoidal flareups (flareups? maybe more like forest fires in july. or flare ups...on the SUN. yeah that'll make me scream the next time i go to the bathroom. i tried to tell rob about how bad they were...you know us women need some empathy now and then...and he's like, whatever, i've had them all my life. grrr. always gotta one up someone...why he can't just say in a soothing voice, 'oh, i'm sorry, baby' and mean it, i'll never know...it's really all i want when i share such news). okay, i'll just get some water and go back to bed...no problem.

so i fumble my way downstairs in the dark for some water, trying not to trip over my black dog who just MELDS into the night and have many a time preempted an accidentally trip and caused me to fall on top of her...who knew black dogs could pose such nighttime hazards? seriously, that's the real danger of having a rottweiler in the house! once she growled and snapped at me when i fell on her. like WTF, you think i did that on purpose? another time when i tripped on her, i hear rob call out to me in the dark, geez honey, did you apologize to the dog? uh, no, i was busy trying to get my heart back out of my throat from nearly killing myself and my dog. but i did apologetically rub kaya's neck and tell her i was sorry (sorry that your tired ass has to park itself right in the middle of the ONLY path to the bathroom when it's dark!!!)

so anyway, got water and tried to get back to sleep, and basically tossed and turned for several more hours, tired but can't sleep and still getting thirstier by the second. so here i am, downing my third glass of water and getting some thoughts down on this here blog. ***ozzy finally woke up to feed! ah relief!*** just got back from feeding ozzy, but am nowhere near being able to fall asleep. it's past 3 am now. i had hoped that by going to bed earlier i could clock more than 3 hours of sleep a night, but seems like 3 hours is all that i'm programmed to do at this point. i read that once you get into a cycle of interrupted sleep, where you fail to get enough REM sleep, you can fall into a cycle of insomnia that continues to perpetuate the problem. let's call tonight Day 1 of Operation Slumber Party and hope that in the ensuing days, this problems resolves itself. rob leaves for boston tomorrow...not sure how i'll manage to get two in bed and still get some rest myself.

i guess that's all i have to say. still not sleepy.... no, not sleepy yet....nope. nada...yep, this sucks. guess i'll go clean up the kitchen while i'm up.

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