when mimi was younger, we'd sometimes play hide and seek and if i didnt immediately see some part of her hanging out of her hiding place, all i'd have to do is go, "mimi? are you in here?" and invariably she's yell out in a singsong voice, "noooo-oh" and then giggle and i'd have no trouble finding where she was. and if someone told her something in confidence, she come right to me and tell me what she was told not to tell me, explaining that she was told not to tell. at that age, they just tell on themselves, but now, at 5 years and 9 months of age, she's gotten incredibly good at not telling me what i want to know: like, what did you and daddy get mommy for christmas?
when kindergarten first started for her this fall, mimi told me every day that she didnt like school because it was too long. by october, she started to answer my chronic "do you like school, now?" question with 'yes." but as recently as two weeks ago, she says to me, "mom, remember when you asked me if i liked school and i told you yes? well, if i told you no, you would be sad, right? i didnt want you to be sad, mom, but i really still dont like school."
i remember being surprised by her confession... she had lied to me?! not just lied, but lied to spare my feelings? i hadnt realized she was so adept at keeping things from me. when did that happen? i'm not saying she's never lied before. of course she has. if she's afraid she'll get in trouble, she'll deny having done something, but NEVER with enough finesse for me to not recognize that she was lying. and then to lie, not to get herself out of trouble, but to spare me sadness? and to do it well enough so that i never suspected a thing? the level of maturity that took was kind of scary.
so back to my christmas gift. while it IS my usual modus operandi to peck away at someone until they finally give up and tell me what my present is, this time, my methods of wearing down mimi has less to do with wanting to know and more to do with trying to gauge just how good mimi is at keeping something secret from me. and if i happen to find out, then woohoo! double score!
so today, i know she and rob were holed up in a room wrapping my gift, so when they finally resurfaced, i said, what were you doing? she says, "wrapping a gift." "oh, yeah?, " i say, nonchalantly, hoping to catch her off guard, "what was it?" she barely spares me a glance and says, "mom, if i tell you, it won't be special. you'll see."
damn. this kid is good.
i'll have to break out the big guns in the next fews days. thank goodness school has been cancelled for the week...that gives me more time to work her over.
when kindergarten first started for her this fall, mimi told me every day that she didnt like school because it was too long. by october, she started to answer my chronic "do you like school, now?" question with 'yes." but as recently as two weeks ago, she says to me, "mom, remember when you asked me if i liked school and i told you yes? well, if i told you no, you would be sad, right? i didnt want you to be sad, mom, but i really still dont like school."
i remember being surprised by her confession... she had lied to me?! not just lied, but lied to spare my feelings? i hadnt realized she was so adept at keeping things from me. when did that happen? i'm not saying she's never lied before. of course she has. if she's afraid she'll get in trouble, she'll deny having done something, but NEVER with enough finesse for me to not recognize that she was lying. and then to lie, not to get herself out of trouble, but to spare me sadness? and to do it well enough so that i never suspected a thing? the level of maturity that took was kind of scary.
so back to my christmas gift. while it IS my usual modus operandi to peck away at someone until they finally give up and tell me what my present is, this time, my methods of wearing down mimi has less to do with wanting to know and more to do with trying to gauge just how good mimi is at keeping something secret from me. and if i happen to find out, then woohoo! double score!
so today, i know she and rob were holed up in a room wrapping my gift, so when they finally resurfaced, i said, what were you doing? she says, "wrapping a gift." "oh, yeah?, " i say, nonchalantly, hoping to catch her off guard, "what was it?" she barely spares me a glance and says, "mom, if i tell you, it won't be special. you'll see."
damn. this kid is good.
i'll have to break out the big guns in the next fews days. thank goodness school has been cancelled for the week...that gives me more time to work her over.
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