so today i was loving a peaceful dinner where mimi was getting ozzy to eat his green beans and chicken by pretending they were trains going into the tunnel. after they cleared their plates, they ran from the table to go play and while in their workroom, ozzy pushed a kid's couch on mimi's hand, but he was immediately sorry and ran to fetch her an ice pack from the freezer and gave her a hug, then turned to me and said, "mommy, can you not be scary to little people?" (yep, that's me...scary mommy, scaring the little people)
sometimes when i think about giving up on life in general, and sitting like a blob all day, unbidden my mind fills up with images of a neglected garden turning brown, rotting, dying, and thats often enough motivation to keep going, if for no other reason than to prevent the desolation from becoming reality. is it weird that when i think of dying one day, that i get sad knowing my garden will die when i am gone? i dont think anyone else would go tend to it when i am no longer around. i hope they will at least keep a plant or two in remembrance of me, but the little pollinator waystation i've been working for several years now to create will likely be razed and no more.
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